Man, the guys in the intro are shitty at lip-syncing. They
just stand motionless with their mouths open.
I assume that they’re really going “AAAAARGH” and we just can’t hear it.
Well, I guess that’s a good first impression in terms of
animation. They’re so lazy that they can’t
even bother to animate the lip flaps in
the opening scene (you know, the one that’s meant to grab your attention?). The
first actual character motions occur more than thirty seconds in. That’s when I knew that I was going to be in
for a good time here. Oh, Studio Deen,
you always never disappoint. Even later on, crying characters stand
motionless and vibrate, like they’re paper dolls attached to popsicle sticks
being waved around. Most of the motion
here is in the lip flaps and the camera being panned around (giving the
illusion of animation). It looks so
cheap and lazy that I find myself forgiving Golden
Time, of all things!
And here’s our main character. I could mock the character design, but now I’m
just thankful that it makes determining gender easier (the bare chest reminds
me of Free), because some of the
characters here are… difficult. Not Vaarsuvius
difficult, but still. I don’t even know
why our main bothers wearing a shirt, considering how frequently it gets
removed over the course of this episode.
He’s probably just a bit thick, considering how he needs to be told the
same thing several times before he understands it (Whoa, being a
government-approved singer [hahaha] means that I’ll be approved by the
government to sing? Really?) and
reminded about things he supposedly already knows. Also, he may have a thing for little
boys.
There are so many anachronisms here, it’s a bit
annoying. Yes, I know that this show isn’t
supposed to be all that realistic, but if you want to have pizza and
loudspeakers and glowsticks, at least have the decency to not set it in a
specific point in the past. I can see
little reason for this not to be set in modern day, or at least some alternate
universe. Setting it in the Tokugawa period
(they specifically state it at the top of the episode) just makes the people
writing this look like they’re begging for criticism. I mean, having a boy band wearing themed
samurai outfits in this day and age doesn’t sound so out there, does it? Some
anachronisms are okay, but the story has to actually feel connected to the
setting (think Samurai Champloo
here), and this sooo doesn’t. Hell, they
talk about rock being formed in the west, which, even with my limited knowledge
of timelines, I know happened a bit after the Tokugawa period. They shouldn’t have explained anything, and
then I could have accepted it.
Though, admittedly, minus the setting, this plot premise is
so dumb and cheesy that I kind of love it, at least on paper. Rock (though the rock here is the kind that
belongs in quotation marks, sadly) bishies versus idol-pop bishies could, with
toned-down character designs, un-shitified animation, and much better writing,
be an amazing guilty pleasure show in the veins of Ouran. It could, but it won’t. Imagine it: fighting for fangirls, the guys
deliberately writing shameless crap to try to draw horny teenage girls in,
wearing sleeveless shirts and fake tans.
It could make some interesting social commentary on the music industry
and how shallow many music fans are and it would actually have meaning! Hell, even the
female ecchi-fans would probably enjoy that!
But, again, this isn’t that, so I’ll shut up and stop dreaming.
…However, having the idols be the government employees is...
well, I hope that was supposed to be funny, because I had a pretty good laugh
over it. This whole episode was pretty
laugh-dense, but most of the stuff I laughed at admittedly probably was meant
to be taken seriously. The song lyrics,
the government-sanctioned ‘guitar hunt’, and other stuff that I won’t spoil
here are definitely pretty funny (let’s just say, the government money-making/control
conspiracy is sporfle-worthy and is explained without a hint of irony while
dramatic music plays). The whole
rock-being-banned thing could be interesting, if given moral/social reasons,
but it isn’t here so another opportunity is completely wasted.
The writing is so bad, it’s adorable. My god, you can practically hear the DUN DA
DUNNN when the villain randomly decides to make his proclamation, the record
scratch when someone says something quirky, et cetera…
The laser shirt-flying-off song sequence at the end takes the
cheesecake, though. It’s so bad it’s
amazing, and a testament to that is how I had to keep pausing the video to
laugh (and to listen to real music). I
honestly can’t describe how amazing it is, so you all need to go and watch it
right now, because it’s some of the funniest shit ever.
How could you tell me
that I'm great
When they chew me up,
spit me out, pissed on me?
…whoops, sorry, my mind skipped to a good rock band just now.
Forgive me if that happens again…
You have no idea…
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