So, our incredibly creative plot of a boy transferring into
an all-girls school gets going…
… wait. You have this
giant school for six students? Really? Then why are the classrooms completely full
of desks? Why are there only six? What the hell? And, of course, the main character gets the
desk by the window. In his bubble of isolation.
These moe-as-hell girls all have the same face, and it
really does not convey drama or subtlety, which this anime apparently wants to
do. It wants to be dark and intense, but
these big-eyed dumb moefaces can’t convey anything like that. Their eyes are far too big to allow me to
take them seriously. And it’s really noticeable, especially because
the guy character has far more realistic proportions. Not like this anime gives a shit about him,
as he, the main character, doesn’t
show up in the promo material. We just
get the anime chicks. Shocker.
Sucks, because the lighting and background detail here is
actually very, very good. Shading is
conveyed excellently, and even stylishly.
But, again, the very cartoony character designs look very strange and
poorly integrated, as the well-drawn, realistic backgrounds do not mesh with these less reserved
designs. It’s like if Hollywood made a
serious murder mystery movie, and everything was very dark and serious except
for the fact that everyone wore pink footie pajamas. It’s a bit distracting, is what I’m
saying. The director for this deserves a
cookie (well, if he cuts out all of the perv-shots). The character designer, not so much.
Of course, he gets a sexy pinkhaired maid. Oh wait, no, the class representative just
happens to like running around in a maid outfit, you know, just for
funzies. Nothing stupid here. Carry on.
Then, of course, we get Senjougahara. Um, I mean her less-awesome cousin. Speaking of Senjougahara, wasn’t her dialogue
so well-written? I miss her.
I admit, I do kind of like the idea of having a girl who is
actually quite nice pretending to be a tsundere to get men’s attention. But this is a harem, so any good ideas it has
will all be split up and shelved and every character’s screentime will be one
fifth what it should be and there will be no resolution. And she’s pretty annoying, anyway.
Oh, yes, we get the loli girl who like snacks. Creative.
I know what you are all thinking, though: what do her panties look like? Don’t worry, you can find that out if you
merely complete the herculean task of sitting through this tripe. However, you should note that you get added to
a government watchlist if you do.
Most of the girls are introduced via pantyshots (I counted
ten, because they’re so creepy and obvious that I decided to keep a running
tally to help ease the pain. It didn’t
help.). Yes, I can so easily take these
characters seriously. And they’re dumb, as
they don’t seem to even notice that they’re displaying their underwear for
everyone to see. Either that, or they’re
just exhibitionists. Or this anime is
meant to be viewed with one hand under the table. Who knows? And there’s plenty of breast bounces for even
more funzies (we even get some censored spotlight breasts!).
They’re like the sun.
You can’t look directly at them, or you go blind.
I’m perfectly fine with an anime having some pervyness (see:
Bakemonogatari), but even I have a
line. This anime is so awkwardly horny/pandering
that I have zero trust in its ability to tell a properly-functioning story,
which it seems like it wants to do.
The really tragic thing is, there are moments of good in
this episode. The main character gets
some amusing lines in, the production quality is pretty high, there’s some
atmosphere, and there are even some clever moments. This seems to be one of those shows that gets
UBERDARK later on, with each of the girls having some sort of tragic past,
which would certainly be more interesting than this samey pandering high-school
crap. I can even almost bring myself to
excuse the most blatantly pandering scene (“Oh, I snuck in you room and
stripped naked just because it’s too far to walk to my room to get
changed! And I forgot to lock the
door! Teehee!”), because the character
turns out to just be doing that to distract the protagonist from what she’s
really doing (searching his room, which he caught her doing). I mean, she’s still slutty (and it’s still
dumb), but at least the writers are actually trying to think their way through
this instead of going DOOHOOGIRLSHAVEBREASTSYAY. In fact, someone more forgiving than I might
even say that all of the panty shots are because the girls are trying to seduce
him so he doesn’t notice their sinister activities. However, to that I say this: what about this, then?
…so, I really can’t forgive this. I know that this was apparently adapted from
an adult visual novel, but the makers really could have taken the high road and
cut this crap out, as telling a good story (that people take seriously)
generally doesn’t mix well with awkward teenage-boy-pandering pseudoporn. Maybe this episode had a ton of ecchi just to
get butts in the seats, and they’ll tone down on it later once their viewership
is secured? I don’t know, but it still
annoys me, and it should annoy everyone who has to sit through this stuff. People who want to watch porn can just watch
porn. Why watch this? I want a good story, and I don’t feel like
having to weather this fap material to get to it.
Um… at least this anime’s pervyness is equal-opportunity?
Crap, now I want to watch an anime where a girl transfers
into an all-boy school and has a bunch of sexy boys tripping over themselves to
get her attention. And they’re actually
part of a murder cult or something.
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